Thursday, 7 January 2010

BABY EDITION: This is for you.

I recently had someone come to my blog here from a search term that I could have written myself. It was:

"Why aren't I a happy pregnant person?"

I almost cried when I saw it.

And so this post is for you, dear Unhappy Pregnant Person.

Dear searcher, I am in your camp. I know MANY other women in your camp, but I only got that information after I opened up and was honest about it. I mean, h*ll. I have complications to little Loki's pregnancy, and I'm taking it on the chin and being proactive, getting everything done. But am I walking around in a haze of rainbows and puppy dog breath?

No.

Because let me let you in on a little secret that nobody seems to put in those 8 billion STUPID pregnancy books:

Cooking up a baby is HARD WORK. Your body struggles. It overdoses on chemicals. It gets too much sugar. You get pains you've never had, feel tired like never before, and you watch in horror as your baby MOVES IN YOUR BELLY. Just like in ALIEN. No kidding!

There are wonderful parts too, don't get me wrong. Seeing your belly move. Seeing the joy on your partner's face as he (or she) feels your baby move. Picking out the going home outfit, or special something for your partner to help them remember this time. So many things.

But this is hard work. And nobody expects you to be Miss Tubby Joy Wonder about the whole thing. Give your body and your mind a break, and just take it as it comes, and try not to judge yourself by those cracked-out earthmothers that EVERYONE seems to have been.

Because they so weren't. Trust me.

And if you need to vent, shoot me a mail. I'm here for you.

-----

Little Loki,

We're coming down to the wire! Third trimester, HELLO!! And I want you to know that whatever pain, irritation, unhappy pregnant or whatevs I am, that you are worth it all. It's not your fault that evolution threw out a wicked curve ball for human mothers.

And you're so active, and scrabbly, and I can see you move across my belly. You're so strong, in fact, that you woke up the Blackcat from his deep sleep this morning as you kicked out - and hit him. His expression was priceless (for I was already up and reading my emails from my iPod touch, you are a STRONG kicker!!) because he stuck his nose out, ever so gently, and nudged my belly where you were. You kicked again, and he moved up to the crook of my arm to sleep the rest of the time.

It's little moments like these that I write these posts for. I want to be able to remember them all, to tell you one day.

How special you are.

And how much your entire family loves you already.

(Well, except for the Blue cat okay. He wakes you up from your naps with his LOUD MEOWS)

3 comments:

Heidi Willis said...

Amen! Unhappy preggers unite!! But the baby moving... I remember even while being violently ill, that it was all worth it to feel the baby moving. Mine were gymnasts and soccer players, and I love that.

You're coming down to the wire, now. I so can't wait!

marsh to the fore said...

That has got to be a precious document and how important it is to have this record of Loki to show to her.

I remember my babies moving. That has got to be one of the most amazing things--and to have it affect the cat! Priceless.

Heidi Yantzi said...

Oh yeah, Nigel the cat was well bonded with my babies from before they were born! He would lie on my big belly and purr. Years later my daughter would fall asleep with the black cat tucked under her arm, and he always stayed until she was fast asleep. I think your boys will appreciate the time you spend with your new baby. You baby and two cats in a big pile of affection!

And you know what, I love your bravery and honesty so much. Thanks for making it okay to say it like it is. You're so awesome!

And yes it's worth it!!!